Oh My Heartsie Girls Wonderful Wednesday

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Well this week is calm, just being my husband’s caregiver and 3 appointments and PT for my shoulder. How about you, what do you have going on this week?

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Separating from a Toxic Spouse

Separating from a Toxic Spouse

A good marriage is worth fighting for. Sometimes, a bad marriage is worth fighting for as well. A toxic marriage, however, calls for a certain step: separation. If your spouse is verbally, physically, or psychologically abusive, then you need to step out of the situation and begin to protect yourself.

It’s not loving to stay with someone who hurts you. It’s terrible for you, but you’re not being noble. You’re harming your spouse as well. By enabling their behavior, you’re limiting their ability to get help and change. The best thing you can do for both of you is separate yourself from their toxic behavior. When-Enough-is-Enough-Should-It-Be-Counseling-or-Divorce
How Do I Know if My Spouse Is Toxic?

Unless abuse is physical, it can be hard to know when a spouse has crossed a line. Manipulation, guilt-tripping, ignoring, and isolating behaviors are all considered psychological abuse. Verbal abuse is similar to psychological abuse and can can include trivializing your feelings, hurtful things disguised as jokes, or denying any wrongdoing in a situation. Look at a list of the both the symptoms and common instances of psychological and verbal abuse. Your spouse may seem all right, but if you bear a deep burden of pain, feel dirty or worthless, or have any other recurring, negative feelings, you should consider the possibility that your spouse is abusive. It can be hard to recognize abuse, especially when you’re used to your spouse’s behavior, and when your spouse insists they’re normal. Your spouse is not behaving normally, however, and you deserve better.

Three Steps for Separation
If you’ve realized that your spouse is, in fact, toxic, then it’s time to separate. You should never attempt to break with a spouse on your own, so find a therapist or therapy group that will keep you strong during this transition. Without help surrounding you, you may sink back into the old relationships and allow the cycle of abuse to continue. You also have a lot of healing to do, so a therapist is a great idea.

Your next step will be to become independent. Find a place to live, not just for a week, but for an extended period of time. Make sure your finances are in good shape and separate from your spouse’s. You may want to open new investments with stocks under 1, just to get yourself started on a new financially secure future.

Your last step should be preparing for any counter attacks. This is why a support group is so important. Your spouse may hound you. They may lay false allegations of abuse on you, allegations that you should fight with an Ann Arbor lawyer. In short, your spouse will likely use toxic tactics to get you back. Be ready for a fight, and rely on the strength of others to get through it.

Your journey won’t be easy, but it will be important. You deserve a better life, and your spouse deserves to face themselves in the mirror. Get help, and separate from your toxic spouse as soon as possible.
Related:
How To Heal A Breaking Marriage With Personalized Couple Therapy?

6 Ways to Distress Through Meditation and Exercise

If you feel like stress always has you running around in circles, it’s time to say goodbye to the sources of your stress. Stress shouldn’t control your life. You can make simple changes today that have a large impact on your future.

Most adults face stress on a daily basis, whether it’s related to relationships, fears, workload, or finances. If your life situations keep you awake at night, it’s time to make some changes. The list below contains our six favorite tips for de-stressing fast.

6-Ways-to-Distress-Through-Meditation-and-Exercise

Relax

Everyone needs a way to relax. For you, relaxing might involve a walk through the woods, having a cup of tea, or doing yoga. Try to avoid using passive relaxation activities, such as watching TV, as your source of de-stressing. More active relaxation methods, such as meditation, work better. Also, if you use bad habits like smoking to distress, consider switching to vapes and look for cheap ejuice, for a safer and more cost-effective way to unwind.

Lighten Your Workload

The less you have to worry about, the less you’ll worry. If you work too many hours or work more than one job, your workload may cause you stress. Whenever you can, lighten your load. A job that gives you stomach ulcers isn’t worth it. Let go of work stress and cut back on excess hours.

Talk it Out

Whatever your source of stress, you can relieve it when you talk to friends. Bring your worries and woes to an empathetic ear, and offer the same gift to your friend, as well. Talking about your problems helps you feel less stressed since it removes some of those bottled up feelings.

Fix Your Finances

If your money situation stresses you, take serious steps to change it. Invest in your future with an RSI trading strategy, and start saving for retirement. If you’re in debt, cut back on your standard of living, and work hard on paying off your debt. Debt calls for serious life changes; don’t be afraid to make them.

Meditate

Meditation is a time-honored tradition and a wonderful way to relax. You might not be much for “hippie” solutions, but that doesn’t mean you can’t benefit from meditation. Easy ways to meditate include either focusing on your breathing or staring at your closed eyelids. When you concentrate on a single thing, your body calms. Meditation provides health benefits, so it’s worth investigating.

Get Better Rest

A good night’s sleep may stand in the way of your calm. Likewise, your stress stands between you and a good night’s sleep. If you need to banish restless nights for good, become more intentional about your rest. Get better sleep by replacing old, uncomfortable bedding, cutting out blue light, or using any of these de-stressing methods. The less stressed you are, the better you’ll sleep; the better you sleep, the less stressed you’ll be.

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Related:
Why You Should Embrace Exercise as a Stress Reducer
8 Ways to Improve Your Spirituality

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