Relationship Archives - Page 5 of 5

May 7, 2018September 4, 2020

Separating from a Toxic Spouse

Separating from a Toxic Spouse

A good marriage is worth fighting for. Sometimes, a bad marriage is worth fighting for as well. A toxic marriage, however, calls for a certain step: separation. If your spouse is verbally, physically, or psychologically abusive, then you need to step out of the situation and begin to protect yourself.

It’s not loving to stay with someone who hurts you. It’s terrible for you, but you’re not being noble. You’re harming your spouse as well. By enabling their behavior, you’re limiting their ability to get help and change. The best thing you can do for both of you is separate yourself from their toxic behavior.
How Do I Know if My Spouse Is Toxic?

Unless abuse is physical, it can be hard to know when a spouse has crossed a line. Manipulation, guilt-tripping, ignoring, and isolating behaviors are all considered psychological abuse. Verbal abuse is similar to psychological abuse and can can include trivializing your feelings, hurtful things disguised as jokes, or denying any wrongdoing in a situation. Look at a list of the both the symptoms and common instances of psychological and verbal abuse. Your spouse may seem all right, but if you bear a deep burden of pain, feel dirty or worthless, or have any other recurring, negative feelings, you should consider the possibility that your spouse is abusive. It can be hard to recognize abuse, especially when you’re used to your spouse’s behavior, and when your spouse insists they’re normal. Your spouse is not behaving normally, however, and you deserve better.

Three Steps for Separation
If you’ve realized that your spouse is, in fact, toxic, then it’s time to separate. You should never attempt to break with a spouse on your own, so find a therapist or therapy group that will keep you strong during this transition. Without help surrounding you, you may sink back into the old relationships and allow the cycle of abuse to continue. You also have a lot of healing to do, so a therapist is a great idea.

Your next step will be to become independent. Find a place to live, not just for a week, but for an extended period of time. Make sure your finances are in good shape and separate from your spouse’s. You may want to open new investments with stocks under 1, just to get yourself started on a new financially secure future.

Your last step should be preparing for any counter attacks. This is why a support group is so important. Your spouse may hound you. They may lay false allegations of abuse on you, allegations that you should fight with an Ann Arbor lawyer. In short, your spouse will likely use toxic tactics to get you back. Be ready for a fight, and rely on the strength of others to get through it.

Your journey won’t be easy, but it will be important. You deserve a better life, and your spouse deserves to face themselves in the mirror. Get help, and separate from your toxic spouse as soon as possible.
Related:
How To Heal A Breaking Marriage With Personalized Couple Therapy?

May 3, 2018

Parting Ways With Your Partner – What You Need To Know

No two marriages are the same, so it stands to reason that no two divorces are the same. The way property is divided in a divorce is mandated by the laws of the state in which the couple live.

However, some property does not easily fit into neat little boxes. How is it determined who “owns” finances after the divorce?

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What if the intellectual property predates the marriage?

Can the spouse claim ownership due to their influence of their partners creativity while they were together?

Sometimes the lines of ownership of any kind of property are blurred. It takes the skills of a qualified attorney to define the division in a way that is fair to all parties. We are going to attempt to put this information in language that anyone can understand.

Please do not assume this covers all examples and exceptions, as that would not be possible. Please contact your attorney to discuss your individual case.

Marital Property

Generally speaking, anything that was received or purchased during the marriage belongs to both spouses.

This means if the property or funds were acquired while you were together and they were not individual gifts or inheritances, they belong equally to each spouse. There are exceptions to this rule.

These exceptions usually occur when a gift or money from property and accounts become commingled. Generally, when blended with marital funds, they become community property. If money or property were brought into the marriage and kept separate during the marriage, it is usually not community property.

Intellectual Property

Intellectual property refers to creations of the mind. Artist, writers, songwriters, designers and many other creative people create intellectual property. This is one of the most complicated of divorce divisions. In its simplest form, it breaks down this way:

If the work was done that created the intellectual property took place before the marriage, it is usual for it to remain the property of the creator. This remains true, even if the copyright is obtained shortly after the marriage took place.

The actual creation was prior marriage. However, if the effort was expended to create the intellectual property after the marriage took place, it is marital property and the interests in the property are owned equally by each spouse.

However, it is rarely that easy to determine ownership of intellectual property. Other considerations that the courts will weigh are:

Were marital funds used to develop, market, and patent the property?
Did each spouse put effort into the growth and/or promotion of the “product”?
Is the intellectual property complete?

Even more confusion

There are times with the intellectual property is incomplete and as such, not earning money yet. If the item was designed prior to the marriage but has not yet been marketed, will the former spouse own any of the rights when the property is marketed?

What if a person has written a book, or produced a film during the marriage, which is successful and ruled to belong to each of the spouses, and they are in the process of producing the sequel? Will the spouse own any of the rights to the next book or film which will be marketed after the divorce? Where does the intellectual property ownership end?

These are just a few examples of the issues family law attorneys face every day, the state laws, courts, and prior factors have a huge impact on the outcomes of these situations, in any divorce, there are sensitive areas.

When it comes to the creative powers of a person, it becomes very personal. This is not something you can address alone. Contact your attorney for help.

March 25, 2018

Become a Better You Inside and Out

It’s always an internal struggle trying to figure out what the right thing to do is and how to be a better person. You may feel that some people come close to actual perfection, but it’s just not possible. Everyone is constantly learning, growing, and trying to make the best out of every situation. Here are 15 ways for you to grow into a better person today.

1. Let The Little Things Go

The chances of the little things mattering in the near future is very unlikely. Dwelling on it and thinking about it will only mess with your mind and your emotions. Just let it go. Everything works out in the end.

2. Take Control Of Your Emotions

Every emotion you feel is normal and powerful, but sometimes when we act out of anger or sadness, it only leads to regret. Take some time to yourself to think about your emotions before you instantly act on them. It also is a lot easier said than done, but you should let go of your anger. Built up anger may affect your health. It can cause digestive problems, difficulty sleeping, and even heart disease.

3. Move

Stay active. We aren’t meant to live a sedentary life. More movement translates into more happiness. Supplements may be able to help you get that extra boost. You can check Scams Review to find out which supplement works best for you.

4. Eat Healthier

You have definitely been told this a million times, but eating healthier actually does make your mind and body feel better. Cut out the sugar and add more fruits and vegetables to your diet.

5. Read

Reading has the ability to take you to another universe. It can teach you about the world and improve your emotional intelligence. It also will make you a better writer and communicator. In this world, communication is key. If books aren’t your thing, read anything else.

6. Give

Whatever you can give, give. Whether it be your time, money, or skills, giving is a humbling experience. You may not be able to save the world, but specifically giving locally will show you the impact you can have. It will also make you feel great.

“Don’t make a change too complicated, just begin.” Anonymous

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7. Make Time For Yourself

You will have nothing to give if you don’t give to yourself. It’s important to take time out of every day to honor and support your emotional wellbeing.

8. Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Nothing wonderful ever came from staying in one’s comfort zone. Being uncomfortable can be stressful and scary but you know that it will all be worth it. You will never know what you’re capable of if you never leave your comfort zone.

9. Spend Time With Friends

Unfortunately today, real conversations with friends have been replaced with likes and comments on social media. Make the time to see your friends in real life. Have real conversations where you may actually “lol”, but for real.

10. Put Yourself In Their Shoes

You may not be ready to hear this, but you are not always right. Think about where the other person is coming from. Listen to their points and validate their feelings. Being a good listener can change your life for the better.

11. There’s Room For Failure

Everyone makes mistakes because everyone is only human. It’s ok to fail and make mistakes but make sure you take responsibility for them. The only way you will ever succeed is by failing. Make sure you give yourself credit for all the mistakes you didn’t make as well.

12. Don’t Take Shortcuts

The best results come from long hard work. Taking shortcuts will only cheapen the results. Don’t make any excuses as to why you can’t get it done. Own up to everything you need to do to succeed. The best people to be around are the people who don’t hide from hard work.

13. Be Kind and Honest

Being a better you can only be done by being better to other people. Kindness shows compassion that touches everyone. It doesn’t cost you or anyone else to be polite, share a compliment, or to be honest. It hurts to be lied to, so don’t be the liar. Learn how to articulate your thoughts, feelings, and ideas in an open and honest way.

14. Don’t Compare Yourself To Others

The moment you start comparing yourself to others is the moment you push yourself off your own unique path. There is enough success and happiness in the world to go around, so stop focusing on what you want from them, and focus on your path to reach your goals.

15. Be Open To Change

Being open to change allows you to grow because you experience something new. Nothing stays the same forever, so enjoy every moment and every change that enters your life.

March 6, 2018

Stress Busting For Couples Without The Kids

Stress-Busting Activities For When You’ve Got Time Without The Kids

It’s a slightly taboo thing to say, but every parent appreciates the feeling of muted elation after dropping their kids off for a weekend with their folks, or having them stay over with a friends’ children for an evening. The freedom from responsibility and constant vigil is itself a stress-reliever, but often once you’re alone with your partner, you can tend to settle on lazy, sedate activities to maximize your relaxation period while the little terrors are elsewhere. This is a waste of the precious time that you can use to pump excitement and thrills into your adult life that has a hugely stress-busting effect on your wellbeing. Check out these tips for activities that’ll release stress while your kids are away.

Romantic Plans

It won’t do to mention one of life’s great romantic stress-relievers, but outside of the bedroom, there’s plenty more ‘date night’ or ‘romantic getaway’ options that will bring you closer to your partner, reviving a love that can sometimes find itself strained around the constant presence of kids. If you feel like you and your significant other deserve to max-out on romantic pleasures, book a spa weekend or head to a hotel with incredibly surrounding scenery to set the scene for your renewed love.

Everyone knows that romantic love is as much about passion as it is about red wine and roses, so, alternatively, the weekend away to go skiing in the mountains, surfing at the seaside, or canoeing down long twisting rivers could be wonderful for the both of you. When away doing activities, you’ll still have the evenings to look blissfully into one another’s eyes, only in this scenario, after having had some thrills and spills over the course of the day that reminds you how special your loved one really is.

Games with Friends

If you’re super-organized and have arranged to send your kids off for the weekend at the same time as your friends have ushered their children into their grandparents’ arms, then it’s time to let the good times roll, couples style! Letting loose with another couple is so enjoyable because the four of you are all sharing in the heady experience of letting your hair down, rediscovering the freedom of youth and the joys of later wine-sodden nights.

One of the best ways to bring adult friends together is over dinner and games, which can get increasingly rambunctious as the evening progresses and the alcohol supply is drained. Other than evenings in, consider heading to the Cincinnati Escape Room, or other such puzzle-based escape games, where you’ll be forced to test your wits against the clock to find a murderer in a fantasy mystery that’s sure to be as thrilling as it is hilarious – that’s if you manage to escape, of course.

Extreme Sports

Will your children believe that while they were spending time with your folks, you were doing a tandem skydive? Or that you’ve taken up precipitous rock climbing, or canoeing or white water rafting in deep river canyons? Probably not, so make sure you get pictures! This option isn’t for the faint-hearted but may well be best-suited to those with a certain understandable trepidation about throwing themselves out of a plane at a few thousand feet. After all, the thrill is only as high as the fear-factor that goes along with it.

To really go wild when your children are away, there’s probably nothing more thrilling, exciting, adventurous and interesting than jointly deciding, with your partner, to go and get stuck into an adrenaline sport. You’ll be liberated from your day-to-day anxieties and worries when you’re about to jump, dive or climb, but once it’s all over you’ll have a refreshed perspective on the world, and those worries will look that bit smaller because of it. Join the phenomenon, and reap the health and wellbeing benefits of adrenaline pursuits.

Watch Music

You may have met your loved one at a gig or concert, in the mud and dust of a music festival or the dark haze of a club. Even if you didn’t meet with a musical backtrack though, you’ll still likely have bonded as a couple over some of your favorite records or artists – music that gives you something special and intimate as well as conjuring up memories of the time at which you fell in love. Keep up with your favorite artists’ tours so that you’ll be able to plan seeing them and bringing a rush of love and happiness into your life that will boot all existing stress out of the gig.

Alternatively, it can be as rewarding to discover new music with your significant other, creating new memories and bonds to build upon all that you already share. In this case, it’s worth popping into your local live music venues whenever you have an evening without the kids – it’s always a great atmosphere, and the ambiance in and of itself is worth the trip. You’ll be able to slip out with your partner whenever you wish, having spent an evening out o tee up your romantic evening in.

Surprise Your Partner

Love is nothing if it is not spontaneous, surprising and gripping, and surprising your partner with a holiday, restaurant booking or even a new set of undergarments will certainly bring an element of thankfulness, fun and passion back into your relationship that you can revel in away from the stresses of raising a family. You’re the rocks upon which the fate of the family rests, so it’s always a good idea to think of lovely surprises for your loved one.

You don’t have to break the bank with a swanky stay in a 5-star hotel, it’s really the thought that counts, allowing the pair of you to focus on the good times without twiddling your thumbs when the kids are away, wondering what to do with yourselves and why you hadn’t made a plan sooner. Busting stress with spontaneity is a guaranteed winner, so why not get your thinking cap on for next time you’re without the kids.

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Your time without your children in your care should be used to revitalize your relationship, ridding yourself of your domestic stresses by getting out there and seizing the initiative in your free time. Hopefully, these tips will come to mind next time you’re with your partner, thinking of things to do to occupy your child-free time.